Most viewers will actively be seeking a way to drown out the drawl, while our apprentice actually hurls a sword towards his head at one point. If you had to be around that accent every waking second of every day you probably wouldn’t give a crap about his advice either. Watching the movie, it’s no wonder why either. The catch is that the apprentice must also be a Seventh Son of a Seventh Son, of which there is only one left because everyone that travels with Jeff Bridges dies in the heat of battle. What follows is Jeff Bridges along with what is quite possibly the most annoying accent I have ever heard in a film (think of an extremely thick southern accent that also sounds oddly British) looks to recruit someone to continue his legacy. Picture every cliché of high fantasy narratives centered on witches and monster slayers, and toss in some of the most atrocious special effects of modern-day cinema along with high profile actors phoning in such awful performances that it’s clear the only reason they are in the movie in the first place is to cash a paycheck.īased on the novel The Spook’s Apprentice, Seventh Son does indeed follow a Spook (fancy term for dude who hunts monsters) seeking a replacement, as he is simply getting too old for this shit. Seventh Son is so bad I don’t even know where to begin. His first great challenge comes when the powerful Mother Malkin escapes her confinement while the Spook is away. Young Thomas is apprenticed to the local Spook to learn to fight evil spirits. Starring Jeff Bridges, Ben Barnes, Julianne Moore, Alicia Vikander, Kit Harington, Olivia Williams, and Antje Traue.
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